Dressing from the Inside Out

Some years ago, when I was at a crossroads in my life, someone gave me a very important piece of advice: you can’t live your life in fear of what others think of you.  It sounds simple, doesn’t it?  Yet time and again, both personally and professionally, those words have empowered me to make decisions and adopt mindsets that have moved me forward.  They came to mind when I was contemplating starting this business in 2023.  From the outside, it looked like an unconventional career change - from family lawyer to image consultant - but I’m so glad I kept pushing the proverbial door.  I haven’t looked back.  And they come to mind most days, in more subtle ways, when considering my own wardrobe choices.

Psychiatrist Carl Jung said, “The world will ask you who you are, and if you don’t know, the world will tell you.”  I’ve always found that a frightening thought - that without self-assurance and self-knowledge, our identities inevitably get defined by the world around us.  I see this all the time in my work.  We become weighed down by ideas of who we should be and how we should dress, until we feel confused and invisible; we’re not dressing for ourselves anymore.  Instead, we dress to blend in.  We dress in ways we deem “appropriate.”  We hide behind trends or uniforms, choosing what feels acceptable rather than what feels true - and in doing so, we lose our sense of identity.

My work is about helping navigate and gently removing the layers of fear that sit between who you really are on the inside, and how you show up.  When that gap closes, style isn’t a performative thing, it’s deeply personal.  When you stop dressing for approval, however subconscious it might be, you begin dressing with intention and clarity, and the confidence that follows is a side effect, not the goal.  I love helping people stop feeling edited by the world and start feeling at home in themselves.
 

Style Beyond Trends

I’ve never been “into fashion” in the catwalk or high-street sense, led by ever-changing trends.  Trends can be useful tools, but we shouldn’t be ruled by them - that’s a conversation for another day!  I’ve never dressed according to what happened to be fashionable at the time.  What I have always been drawn to is self-expression, and making things look good.  An outfit that works perfectly for one person won’t necessarily work for another.  For clothing to truly suit you, it needs to honour both your physical body and your personality.  We’re all designed uniquely, and that’s one of the reasons I love my work: the outcome depends on the individual.

Have you ever had that feeling, when you try something on in a shop, or you might even have brought it home, and standing in front of the mirror something just doesn’t connect.  You don’t feel like you.  You might have really liked the garment in the shop, led on by relentless flattery from the sales assistant, but you realise once you’re home that it belongs to a version of you that doesn’t quite exist.  This is a reminder that style works best when it’s rooted in self-knowledge - not second-guessing or trying to fit into a box you were never meant to.

The great thing is, there are actually reasons why that feeling of disconnect is present.  It’s not some mystery that will never be solved, and it’s not your fault - if something doesn’t fit you, it’s the clothes that are wrong, not you.  It will always be something to do with colour or style.  There are science-based, methodical ways to break this down and understand why some things serve you much better than others.  This knowledge is game-changing and getting a handle on it for yourself transforms the way you shop.  Choosing clothes stops being unclear, frustrating and disappointing and becomes focused, enjoyable and satisfying.

Style Is Self-Recognition

American fashion designer Iris Apfel said “Fashion you can buy, but style you possess.  The key to style is learning who you are…”  I totally subscribe to this mindset.  Style is about confidence, conviction and being comfortable in your own skin.  When I run a style session with clients in my studio, I explain that the heart of the session is to help get to grips with the person they are, and help them express that in the truest way on the outside.  The most attractive version of you will always be the most authentic one.  

I believe that is where style begins - not with the wardrobe, but with the courage to look inward.  Carl Jung also said “Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”  So many of us project, imitate, try and force versions of ourselves that are shaped by external expectation rather than internal truth.  Clothes are never just clothes.  They represent choices every single day about how visible we allow ourselves to be.  How much permission are we giving ourselves to take up our space in the world?  How honestly are we willing to meet it?  When you dress to reflect who you truly are, you stop negotiating your identity and start owning it.  You awaken.  

Style at its best, is self-recognition.  When you recognise yourself clearly - and honour that with your clothing choices - you give others permission to do the same.

Michaela Sargeant is a Colour and Image Consultant, helping individuals and professionals make confident, informed choices about how they present themselves.  Through personalised colour analysis, image guidance and makeup advice, Michaela supports clients in discovering the colours, styles and makeup tones that suit them best, helping align their appearance with who they are and how they want to be perceived.  Her approach is thoughtful and practical, grounded in the belief that clarity in personal style reduces decision fatigue, builds confidence and allows people to show up more fully in their work and lives.  Michaela lives in Horsham and works from her studio based there.  Contact Michaela at michaela.sargeant@houseofcolour.co.uk, visit www.houseofcolour.co.uk/stylist-profile/michaela-sargeant and follow on Instagram and Facebook @houseofcolour.michaelasargeant.